Voila! Finally, The Rundown
script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the movie starring Sean William Scott,
The Rock, Rosario Dawson, and Christopher Walken. This script is a transcript that was painstakingly
transcribed using the screenplay and/or viewings of The Rundown. I know, I know, I still need to get the cast names in there and I'll be eternally
tweaking it, so if you have any corrections, feel free to
drop me a line. You won't
hurt my feelings. Honest.
I seen the bright lights
of Memphis
And the Commodore Hotel
And underneath the streetlamp
I met a Southern belle
Oh, she took me to the river
[Radio Stations Changing]
[Man]
I just love mushrooms.
One of my favorites,
or as I call it
"the king of mushrooms,"
is the porcini.
Now stop right there.
Don't be alarmed.
There's a lot of confusion
in this country...
between porcini,
the Italian name,
and cèpes,
which is the French name.
They're fat and they're earthy.
Now, the porcini is most often
seen dried here in this country.
And they would always
be labeled "dried porcinis,"
not "dried cèpes."
[Man]
Beck.!
Okay? They are very,
very, very flavorful.
Come on.
It's about time.
Hour and a half I've been waiting.
Man, you're lucky to be getting in.
It's an extremely private party tonight.
Let's go.
[Hip-hop]
What's he drinking?
Jägermeister and Cristal.
Great.
[Hip-hop]
Security?
No, but we do have
a slight problem.
Have fun.
What's the problem?
That's your problem.
Okay, the guy on the left
is Jaleel Johnson.
I think he's like
the left tackle or something.
JamalJohnson.
Defensive end.
He's the best defensive lineman...
Notre Dame's produced
in the last years, maybe ever.
The guy on his left
is KambuiJackson.
Ran for yards last year,
all-pro five years in a row.
The guy in the headband,
that's Fernando Lewis,
middle linebacker.
- Plays a lot like Ray Lewis.
- [Glass Breaks]
- Hejust hits harder.
- Whatever, Beck.
I'm not into football.
The other two guys
areJimmy Coggeshell
and David Mulaire.
- Whoo!
- One's from USC,
the other one's from Ohio State.
- [Bone Cracks]
- [Man] Stay down, bitch.!
Well, anyway, the guy you're
looking for is right there.
That's Brian Knappmiller.
Throws like Brett Favre,
bets like Pete Rose.
So, I'm telling this cat, I'm like,
"Yo, I know it's you thatjumped.
I know it's you.
I saw you jump.
Don't tell me it's not you."
- He's like, "I don't know."
I'm like, "Dog."
- Excuse me.
- It's you. I know.
- [Clears Throat]
Excuse me.
- I'm sorry to bother you guys.
I apologize.
- Hold up, my man.
I ain't got no hookups
to tryout camps. You gotta
show up like everybody else.
You're a big boy though.
I think you'll be all right.
So I'm tellin' the cat
I don't wanna have to sit through...
Excuse me, Brian, I'm sorry.
I'm not here to talk to you
about tryouts
If I could have one minute
of your time.
I got it. Pass me that.
Who do I make this out to, man?
Who do I make it out to?
Yeah, what's your name?
- Beck. B-E-C-K.
- Beck?
- What's up, man?
- What's happening?
- Here you go, man?
Knock yourself out. All right?
- Thank you.
You got it.
Now, what you gonna do?
You gonna come back,
or what?
[Hip-hop Continues]
Excuse me.
I'm really sorry.
Yo, man,
what are you doing, man?
Couple of months ago,
you made some wagers
with an associate of mine.
- Two, three months ago?
- What's up, Knappy?
- Nothing. It's good.
Enjoy your drink.
- What's up, Jimmy?
Bets? You come embarrass me
in front of my friends
about some bets?
Don't mean to embarrass you.
This is embarrassing to me.
I'm a big fan.
But $
you might have remembered.
I know what it is, man.
Listen. There's a "G"
to get me started.
Now you do me a favor.
You tell your man I'm gonna
see him on Monday with the rest.
And not to send anybody else
to see me. All right?
[Sighs]
Brian.
I'm gonna need
some collateral from you.
What?
I'm gonna need the ring.
[Chuckles]
I'm sorry.
Are you... Yo!
Slip it to me under the table,
on the low-low.
I'll make sure you get it back.
On the low-low.
You want the ring? I'll give it.
You want a drink too?
- Thank you.
- Take the ring, buddy.
That's what I think about that.
Get the hell on, man.
Go, man, go.! Go.!
Hey, do something with this.
You heard the man.
Let's go, man. Get up.
Okay.
That's right, playboy, walk.
Go on, man.
Get your ass outta here.
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go
- You all right?
- This shit burns.
[Line Ringing]
[Man]
Hello.
Hey, it's me.
Oh, yeah, he's here.
We got a problem though.
He's got the entire offensive line.
The entire offensive line is here.
Let me do it another night.
How about that?
They've got a legitimate shot
at repeating this year.
I do not want to hurt them.
I don't wanna go out...
[Man On Phone, Indistinct]
Okay, Billy.
[Phone Snaps Shut]
[Sighs]
Is that your chik
People you know
Me and Timbaland been hot
since years ago
What da dilly yo
Now what da dilly yo
If you wanna battle me
Knappmiller, you got two choices.
Option "A": You give me the ring.
[Continues]
Option "B":
I make you give me the ring.
I'll take "B."
- Ooh!
- Wrong choice.
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
Missy be puttin'it down
I'm the hottest round
I told your mutha
Y'all can stop me now
Listen to me now
I'm lastin' rounds
And if you want me, people
Then come and get me now
Is you with me now
The biggie biggie bounce
I know you dig the way
I sw... sw... switched my style
Holla
People sing around
People gather round
- Okay.
- Peoplejump around
Quiet
Shh, hush yo mouth
Silence when I spit it out
- [Bone Breaks]
- In your face
Open yo mouth
Give you a taste
Holla
Ain't no stoppin'me
Copywritten
so don't copy me
Getcho freak on
Getcho freak on
[Continues, Indistinct]
Put him down, man!
[Record Scratches]
Oh! Ohh!
Aah!
[Record Scratches]
[Knappmiller Groans]
- [Bones Crack]
- [Yells]
Yo, man, what's with
all this hostility, man?
You should have taken
option "A."
[Panting]
Are you all right, mate?
Are you okay?
[Groaning]
Thanks, mate.
- [Tires Skid]
- [Buzzes]
There he is.
Why'd you send him, Billy?
Martin?
Oh, he was just backup.
After I got your call,
I wasn't so sure
you could deliver, you know.
- What happened anyway?
- He stole it from me.
He got you
with those beanbags? No.
That is gonna be
off your vig anyway.
Billy, you know I've got plans.
You are gonna stop
nickel and diming me.
It's a tough business, you know,
the restaurant business.
I hear that % of them fail
the first year, and you know why?
Under capitalization.
That's why.
I just don't think...
Billy, I want out.
I want a new life.
I want my money
and I want it now.
Now. Now.
Okay.
[Paper Rustling]
One job.
One job,
I wipe your slate clean.
And you have your restaurant.
Go on.
Open it up.
Come on.
It's a photo
of Travis Alfred Walker.
Stanford dropout,
treasure hunter.
Only, to date, the only thing
he's found is trouble.
Did you say, "Walker"?
My son.
He's from my third marriage.
Lasted about three minutes.
That picture was taken
about two months ago.
Some gold mining town called El Dorado,
down in the middle of the Amazon.
How much?
large.
- With that kind of money,
invite him back yourself.
- The boy doesn't trust me.
- Kidnapping's gonna help.
- Is that sarcasm?
You wanna be sarcastic,
you do it to your monkey friends.
You do not do it to me!
Do you understand?
I'm sorry, Billy.
You're goddamn right
you are.
- What'd he do?
- Pissed off the wrong people.
I don't have to
remind you what happens
when you do that, do I?
So I bought him
some forgiveness.
But if I don't bring him
back here to face the music,
you know damn well
that I can't carry a tune.
So, you deliver
my boy back here.
You bring him
right through that door,
you walk out of this house
a free man...
with a restaurant.
His final words
Don't take your guns to town, son
Leave your guns at home, Bill
Don't take your guns to town
Is that duct tape?
Oh, aye. Aye, aye.
Don't worry there, little fella.
Walk by faith, not by sight. Hmm?
Will you look at that?
We can't land now.
- Why? Why can't we land?
- They got the "booze on the grind."
"Booze on the grind"?
Aye, the bulls on the ground.
The cattle down there.
Cows.
Yeah. I'll give them
a wee fright there.
Ah, get moving! Ah, come on then!
Outta me way!
Outta me way, you.!
Move it.!
Move it now.! Shoo.!
Outta my way.!
Outta me way.
[Laughs]
[Cattle Mooing]
[Pilot Laughing]
All right there, get off the...
Okay, gotcha.
Hey, Sugie, what'd I tell you
about not let... My needle
was totally nackered.
R.P.M. s all over the shaft.
- Is this the only road in and out?
- If you wanna stay alive.
- Why's that?
- That there, that's the jungle, little fella.
You got anacondas in there.
Poison arrow frogs, black flies,
bullet ants.
If they don't get you,
the rebels will.
- What?
- Aye, rebels.
That's what I'm telling you.
To them, Cornelius Hatcher's
built a Babylon in paradise.
- Built a what?
- A Babylon.
Yeah, that mine...
is as close as a man can come
to the gates ofhell,
while his heart's still beating.
The Sunday school picnic
is over, I'll tell you that.
Stay out of the jungle,
little fella, okay?
[Horn Honking]
I, uh... I found these flowers
growing in the deepest parts
of the jungle.
As far as I can tell,
no one's ever identified them,
which means that I'm responsible
for naming them.
I can only think of one word...
that fits something
so beautiful.
Mariana.
How much do you want?
- What?
- How much?
I need your uncle's boat.
A day or two, max.
Mariana, listen.
You borrow my car,
you bring it back with no windshield.
You borrow my brother's scooter...
The scooter was mechanical.
It wasn't my fault.
Now you want to
borrow my uncle's boat?
And, "I found it. I found it."
You will never find
this "Garbo" of yours.
Shh, it's gato.
I told you.
- Gato.
- It's out there, Mariana.
I know exactly where it is.
But I need that boat.
How much?
I told you...
No, how much
is your gato worth?
- This is a very significant
academic find, Mariana.
- How much?
- It's not about money.
- You lie like a little girl.
I'm not lying.
If I get the boat for you,
you have to take me with you.
That's ridiculous.
We're talking about
a lousy boat here.
And we split the take
- .
I've been doing all the work, okay?
I found it. No way.
Fifty-fifty, Travis.
Seventy-thirty.
Fifty-fifty.
- Sixty-forty.
- Fifty-fifty, and I get off
of work at : .
Then we can go
and get your gato.
You're evil.
Thank you.
Whatever.
For the flowers.
Harvey, someone here
to see your brother.
- Where's he from?
- He's an American.
- You got a gun?
- No, I don't like guns.
Check him.
[Speaking Portuguese]
- What's the current payout?
- Give me a payout for quadrant three.
[Speaking Portuguese]
[Frog Trilling]
[Portuguese]
Two-four, two-five.
Down percent.
[Portuguese]
You checked him?
All right. Let's go.
Come on.
Come on.
Never met an American
who didn't like guns.
Tell 'em to dig harder.
If only it were that simple,
eh, Mr. Beck?
- How do you know my name?
- When a man of your dimensions...
travels all this way
to visit a place like this,
it arouses the curiosity.
What can I do for you?
Do you know this man?
Ah, Travis Walker.
I let him do some excavating
around the mine,
allow him to rent a room
in my town,
all for a fair %
of anything he might unearth.
Can you tell me
where to find him?
Yeah, just follow the bullshit.
The guy's got a mouth
should be in the circus.
Brother, please.
Do you have business with him?
I do.
Good. What kind of business?
I love business.
It's personal.
So, why come to me?
When I'm a guest
in another man's house,
Ah.
I don't reach into his refrigerator
without asking permission.
Refrigerator?
I wanna show you something,
Mr. Beck.
Does that look like
a refrigerator to you?
Looks more like hell.
Well, you see hell.
I see a spellbinding
sense of purpose.
I see the value
of keeping your eye on the ball.
When a bride
slips the ring on her finger,
when a businessman
lays his hands on a Rolex,
when a rapper
gets a shiny new tooth,
this is that cost, Mr. Beck.
My horror for their beauty.
My hell for their little slice of heaven.
Somebody's gotta
keep his eye on the ball.
That somebody is me, Mr. Beck.
I am down here every day...
keeping my eye on the ball.
That's just a simple fact oflife.
And if you're bold enough
to face that cold, hard fact,
you can make a lot of money.
- What do you want with the kid?
- I've come to take him home.
That'll cost you $ .
I need to borrow theJeep.
Uh, wait a minute, friend.
I'll give you $ .
Huh?
I'll give you $ .
I need you to take my bag
back to the plane.
Keep the engine running.
Can you do that?
For $ ?
That's right.
I'll find a way.
Declan, I'm gonna
be coming fast.
Yeah.
- [Glasses Clinking]
- [Pool Balls Clacking]
American?
Yeah.
Where from?
Someplace
that's got bartenders.
What can I get you?
I'll take a beer.
- Nice flowers.
- O tolo sorrindo.
The smiling fool.
You know, back in the States,
Brazil nuts like these
go for $ a pound.
Well, those fell
off the tree out back.
And around here
we don't call them Brazil nuts.
What do you call 'em?
Well, we're in Brazil,
so we just call them nuts.
Fair enough.
So what brings you to the Amazon?
Other than the food and drink, of course.
I'm looking for a man.
- What's your type?
- His name's Travis Walker.
Brown hair, he's in his s.
Wears a blue shirt, jeans.
Right now, he's got a real
bewildered look on his face.
- Do I know you?
- The name's Beck.
What can I do for you,
Mr. Beck?
I need you to make
a choice for me.
A choice.
Option "A" or option "B"?
What's option "A"?
Well, option 'A"is you and I
walk outta here nice and easy,
get in myJeep
and we drive back
to the airstrip.
And then we begin
our long journey
back to Los Angeles.
Be no blood,
no broken bones.
And no problems.
[Chuckles]
What's in Los Angeles?
Your father.
What's option "B"?
Pretty much
the opposite of"A."
But I wouldn't recommend
that one.
I'll take option "C."
Travis, there is no option "C."
Really?
Mm-hmm.
Are you sure?
I mean, big boy,
there's always an option "C."
[Groans, Whimpers]
- Ow, ow.! So angry.!
- Shut up.
Shut up!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Like I said,
there is no option "C."
Let me introduce you
to option "C."
[Hatcher]
Mr. Beck.
There's been a slight change
in the narrative.
An unexpected twist
you might say.
Can I have a beer, please?
Mr. Hatcher, I was just gonna
come find you when this...
- The kid stays.
- I paid you.
Well, fortunately,
I had my fingers crossed
the whole time.
Apparently, young Mr. Walker
may have stumbled
onto a trinket of some value,
and as he's located it
in myjungle,
yup, I'm gonna need him
to lead me to it.
Okay, so let's go, dickhead.
- Don't call me a dickhead, you dickhead.
- Did you find it or not, asshole?
- What's that, asshole?
- Harvey.
- Did you find it or not, asshole?
- What's that, asshole?
- Did you find it or not, asshole?
- Don't!
- Hey, don't rock the boat.
[Scoffs]
Okay.
I don't want any trouble.
Then leave now
and don't come back.
And the ?
Consider it tax deductible.
A contribution
to your personal health fund.
With all due respect,
Mr. Hatcher,
I'm feeling pretty healthy.
- Oh, yeah?
- Walk.
Don't make waves.
Look out for the chair!
- Wow.
- [Harvey Whimpering]
You're gonna kill us all,
Mr. Beck?
[Groaning]
[Groans]
I tried to be reasonable.
It's not the way to do business.
You should have kept the gun.
You're dead already.
You just don't know it yet.
This is option "B"?
Are you kidding me?
Quiet.
You're dead.
You're so dead.
We're not gonna
be able to get outta here.
All this land, Hatcher owns it.
- The road that you're on, the air that
you're breathing, Hatcher owns it all.
- Shut up.
Whatever my father's paying you,
I will double it.
No.
I'll quadruple it.
I'll double it and quadruple it.
No. No.
You're being unreasonable.
I'm gonna give you
one more chance to reconsider.
- I'll give you one chance
to shut your mouth.
- Is that your final answer?
For what it's worth,
I hope you enjoy the fall.
- Yeah, what fall?
- This fall.
- [Horn Honks]
- [Engine Revs]
[Both Yell]
[Travis Yelling]
- Oh!
- Whoo-hoo.!
[Together]
Whoa!
[Gasping]
Come on.
Where are the frickin' keys?
That's it. Come on. Oh!
[Handcuffs Unlock]
[Panting]
Travis?
Good God.
Travis!
I'm not going back.
Oh, you're going back.
No way.
Right now.
Who the hell
do you think you are, huh?
You come into my town,
mess up my bar.
- And you eyeball my woman.
- Eyeball your woman?
No, it's on.
What's this, huh?
Who is this?
Is he your friend?
Do you know him?
Do you? Say hello.
Say hello. Say hello.
Ooh, ooh, ooh!
[Groaning]
Are you finished?
Let's go.
Big boy,
you like thunderstorms, huh?
Bet you do, right?
Uh-huh.
Little thunder.
Little lightning.
Stop it.
Stop it!
Thunder, lightning.
Thunder, lightning.
Here's... Oh!
[Groans]
You done beating me up?
Let's go.
Yeah, you win.
I'm tired of this.
[Travis]
Come on!
Go to sleep!
Night-night! Night-night!
Go to sleep!
Come on!
Obviously we got off
on the wrong foot here,
so I'm gonna
be completely candid with you.
[Groans]
Have you ever heard of
the Gato do Diabo?
- The devil's cat.
- You're gonna stop speaking
right now.
All right. Oh!
It's a priceless object, man.
Forged out of pure gold.
- It's worth millions.
- Thought you said it was priceless.
You do not want to argue semantics
with a Ph.D. candidate.
- Ph.D.?
- Yeah. Oh!
I am really very close
to being Dr. Travis Walker.
Dropped out of Stanford
after two semesters, Einstein.
So, I'm fairly close.
Closer than you.
You're close to getting
your ass kicked again.
We got a plane to catch.
Wait. Wait. Wait.
The gato is real, all right?
I know where to find it.
I'll split it with you, - .
Move.
Seventy-thirty?
You're a very unpleasant
individual, you know that?
[Man Yells In Portuguese]
You think they're dead?
What am I, psychic?
I'm gonna cut
that kid's nose off.
No, Harvey,
you wanna get the gato,
'cause if the bad guys get it,
they won't need us anymore.
There'll be no one
to work the mine.
You wanna work the mine?
There are two men in that jungle
who are trying to steal from me.
I feel like a little boy
who's lost his first tooth.
Put it under his pillow,
waiting for the tooth fairy to come.
Only, two evil burglars
have crept in my window...
and snatched it
before she could get here.
- [Portuguese]
- Wait a second.
Do you understand
the concept of the tooth fairy?
Explain it to them.
[Portuguese]
You find a tooth.
You put it under your pillow.
[Harvey Continues in Portuguese]
Wait. She takes the goddamn thing,
gives you a quarter.
They got my tooth.
I want it back.
I have to ask you,
back at the bar, man.
That was crazy.
No guns.
Strip, toss. Toss, strip.
Didn't I tell you to be quiet?
I know. I know.
But what is that?
Some kind of nouveau
Samurai code or something?
You got a problem with guns?
Let's just say they take me
to a place I don't wanna go.
Where do they take you?
To a place you don't wanna
see me go. Walk.
How often
do you work out?
Let me get this straight.
You never use guns?
No.
Never?
Never.
If your best friend
was gonna die?
You wouldn't pick up a gun?
No guns.
Santa Claus would pick up
a gun to save his best friend.
Do I look like Santa Claus?
Do I look like Santa Claus to you?
Guns make you
un poco loco?
Bang-bang crazy?
I pick up guns,
bad things happen to people.
I don't like that.
What kind of things?
Very bad things, Travis.
Walk.
What about knives?
Move.
My father doesn't share
the same distaste
for guns you do.
He's your father.
He's not gonna kill you.
The only thing Billy Walker
cares about is what's
good for business.
Now, the question is,
Mr. Beck, what's good
for your business?
Huh? You don't like money?
I don't make deals
with people like you.
[Snickers]
You don't even know me.
You're just like
every other jackass
I've taken down.
First they try to run,
then they try to fight,
then they try to negotiate.
When that doesn't work, they do
exactly what you're about to do
when you realize it's over.
Oh, yeah?
What's that?
You're gonna get down
on your hands and knees
and you're gonna beg me for a break.
Well, guess what.
I don't give breaks. No breaks.
[Snickers]
You don't understand
the situation.
You borrowed money
from the wrong guy.
You shot the wrong guy.
You slept with
the wrong guy's wife.
I don't care.
Your mistake.
What about you, Mr. Beck?
Haven't you ever
made a mistake?
I know, move.
No breaks.
That's lame.
[Mocking]
No breaks.
I don't give breaks.
Santa Claus
doesn't give any breaks.
[Beck]
Should have been
at the airstrip by now.
Like I'm really gonna
help you out with this.
I didn't ask for your help.
What are you doing?
I have to pee.
Pee in your pants. Move.
No.
I've let you push me around
this jungle for like five hours.
You've been very aggressive.
And I'm not taking another step
until you let me pee.
If you wanna keep going,
you're gonna have to carry me.
And I guarantee,
I'm gonna pee on your head.
You threatening me?
You threatening me with pee?
Well, yeah, if you don't
let me pee here.
Fine. You win. Pee.
Will you unzip me?
No, I'm not gonna unzip you.
You wanna pee?
You have seconds.
How am I supposed to pee with
my hands cuffed behind my back?
Find a way. Pee.
Come on.
Don't make it weird.
Please.
Don't breathe.
Don't say a word.
Don't even look at me.
Look over there.
[Unzips Zipper]
Thanks, man.
Oh, shit.
I can't get it out.
Could you just...
No. Hell no.
God! Son of a...
[Grunts]
Come on! Come on!
Come on!
Oh, hey, hey, I got it.
Congratulations.
You got seconds.
Hurry up.
Don't listen to Tiny Tim, okay?
You're the real big boy.
Everybody knows it.
Ready?
One, two, three. Go.
One, two, three.
Go, go, go, go!
[Urinating]
Oh. Oh, yeah.
[Sighs]
I'm going.
[Laughs]
Oh, boy.
[Grunts]
Whoo!
What is this?
What is...
Travis, hey.
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Welcome to the jungle, tough guy.
Looks like big boy
got himself pig-snared.
Get me down.
Hey, I've got the keys
to your cuffs.
- Oh! Oh, shit.
- I'll tell you what you've got, pal.
You've got problems.
Travis. Don't do it, Travis.
- Hey, hey, get me down. Travis.
- Whoo!
Oh, what's this?
Is this your diary?
- Your little journal? Huh?
- Gimme that. Don't touch that.
Do you want this?
Get it! Get it!
Give that back.
Come on, get it.
Come on! Yeah, yeah!
- Oh, yeah, come on.
Get it, get it, get it!
- Give it to me!
Caw-caw. You're like
a little birdie up there.
Caw-caw. Caw-caw.
Caw-caw. Caw-caw.
Caw-caw. Caw-caw.
I will kill you.
You better give me that book.
"Shrimp and pea risotto
with basil and mint."
- What are you, a chef?
- None of your business.
Gimme the book back!
Well, it looks like
your Wolfgang's stuck
right here, huh?
Travis! Travis!
Hey, I let you pee.
Oh, yeah, you did.
You did. Thank you so much.
Do you have to pee, huh?
Well, you got seconds.
Go ahead and pee.
[Branch Cracks]
Oh, shit. Oh!
Hey, I was totally kidding
about what I said.
Gimme the book.
Turn around.
I don't want it. Oh!
What do you always
gotta hit me?
Now listen to me.
We gotta get to this tree.
Now let's go back to back.
All right. Okay.
Kick your legs.
I'm trying!
I'm kicking my legs!
Where are you?
Grab my back, not my ass.
You got it?
Got it. Got it.
Oh, great, you did it.
Now what? Why?
Pull your arm over me
into the tree.
Listen.
Put your arm over me.
You're likeJoe Pig-snare?
Put your arm over me.
Just stop moving.
Grab the vine.
You gotta grab the...
[Creature Roars]
What was that?
Oh, shit.
What was that?
Monkeys.
[Growls, Trills]
Steady. Steady.
Steady.
[Roars]
[Yells]
- Steady!
- [Roars]
- G-G-G-G-G-G-G...
- [Hisses]
[Travis]
Do not fight them.!
[Beck]
Oh, my God!
[Beck]
What's he doing?
What is he doing?
He's humping you.
He's humping you.
What is he doing?
Establish dominance!
Establish dominance!
- [Beck] Get him off me.!
- [Monkey Grunting]
He's humping me!
[Yells]
Make him stop!
[Gunshots]
Who's that?
It's the rebels. Don't worry.
They're my friends.
Hey.
[Portuguese]
God bless you. Say hi.
Hi.
These are your friends, huh?
Are you kidding me?
I'm starting to long
for a monkey with a hard-on.
[Whispering]
Whatever happens,
just keep looking into his eyes.
Won't that offend him?
No.
Whatever you do,
do no blink.
They're like grizzlies.
Just shut up and let me
take care of this.
[Portuguese]
He thinks we work for Hatcher.
Tell him the truth.
[Mouthing Words]
Fierce gaze. Fierce gaze. Fierce gaze.
[Portuguese]
What's he saying?
Shut up.
Just hold his gaze. Hold his gaze.
[Guns Cocking]
Why do I get the feeling
you really suck at Portuguese?
- Oh! Oh!
- [Portuguese]
Fierce gaze!
- What's going on?
- I think he wants to fight you.
No, we're not fighting.
Tell him I don't want to fight.
[Travis In Portuguese]
I do not want to fight you.
We are not fighting.
I do not want to fight.
We are not fighting.
Don't worry. They're little people.
What?
You can take them.
They're little.
You can win.
Why do you wanna fight?
Why?
I just wanna get back
to the airport.
Please.
I just have to get home.
Okay, hip-hop.
You don't wanna do this.
Please. Please.
Travis, tell them one more time,
I do not wanna fight.
l-I'd love to help you out, buddy,
but I don't think they're really
listening to me anymore.
Heads up.
That's okay!
That is okay.
Hey, Kansas City.
[Portuguese]
- Don't do it.
- [Portuguese]
What is that?
That's like spinning Tarzan jujitsu.
Speedy little bastards,
aren't they?
It's gotta stay up.
- Oh! Ow!
- [Yells]
- [Panting]
- [Drums Stop]
- [Groans]
- [Mouthing Words]
I am not your enemy.
[Gunshot]
- [Portuguese]
- Mariana.
What are you doing here?
Barmaid by day,
rebel leader by night.
You are good.
The whole time
I was working you,
you were working me.
I was hoping you might find
El Gato do Diabo.
[Travis]
It couldn't have all been work.
Could it?
Man, that was some good work.
What do you think, Travis?
I knew.
You know that, right?
I totally knew.
[Mariana In Portuguese]
Hey.
The herbs will keep it
from getting infected.
- Why do you do this?
- Pardon me?
- Why do you fight?
- Because of cents an hour,
Mr. Beck.
That's what Hatcher
pays the workers.
But in order to mine,
you need tools.
You need food, clothing,
a place to sleep.
You have no money,
so what do you do?
You borrow from Hatcher.
Pick and shovel,
a dollar a day.
Sack to hold the dirt,
another dollar.
Mr. Beck knows a lot
about that, don't you?
He knows what it's like
to dig a hole so deep
you can never climb out.
Call it what you want.
Escravidão. Slavery.
And we intend to stop it.
[Portuguese]
Manito wants to know
who you think would win a fight...
between Mike Tyson
and Muhammad Ali.
Ali. Hands down.
[Portuguese]
He says
what about Tyson's power?
Shit.
Tell him Ali would have done to Tyson
what he did to Foreman in Africa.
Ah, Rumble...
Rumble in theJungle.
- Tell him Ali was too smart.
- [Portuguese]
Too smart, too fast.
He would have used his jabs.
Bam.! Bam.!
- [Mariana Translates]
- Would have danced.
Would have played with his mind.
Before you know it,
bam, left to the body.
- Bam, right to the head.
- [Portuguese]
Down goes Tyson.
Float like butterfly.
Sting like bee.
Float like butterfly,
sting like bee.
[Gang]
Float like butterfly,
sting like a bee.
Float like butterfly,
sting like a bee. Aah!
[Portuguese]
He says he thinks
you are a great fighter.
And he wants you to have it.
It's for luck.
- Tell him I'm sorry. I can't.
- You'll offend him if you refuse.
I'm honored. Thank you.
[Mariana]
You'll need all the luck
you can get.
It's a long walk
back to the airfield.
Especially by yourself.
Nice.
You don't understand.
I'm not going back
without him.
- Here we go again.
- Fifty rifles say you are.
And we're rebels, not thieves.
[Gunfire]
Hatcher!
[Yelling In Portuguese]
- Travis!
- [Gunshots]
Travis!
Let's clean it up.
[Gunfire]
[Panting]
Not so fast, jungle boy.
[Motorcycle Approaches]
Move. Move!
[Mariana]
Come on.
Manito!
Get back, Manito. Vamos.
Go! Go! Go!
Manito!
Let's go!
I want hunting parties.
Small ones.
Find them.
Find them!
[Mariana]
All right, this is the way
it's going to be.
You're going to take me
to El Gato do Diabo.
And you're going to take me now.
- Calm down.
- Don't!
You saw what they do.
Don't ever tell me to calm down.
- Travis, don't play with me.
- Or what?
Or I'm going to shoot you.
Well, if you shoot me,
you're never gonna find the gato.
So, we're gonna make
a little deal.
Deal? You see,
El Gato is just an object to you.
It's a life on the Riviera
and a private yacht.
- Lady, you don't know
the first thing about me.
- For us, it's hope.
Oh, you're breakin'my heart.
It's like a telethon.
- You selfish...
- [Rifle Blast]
Sit down. Sit down!
Holy shit.
You tried to shoot me!
You saw it.
- Crazy...
- Shut up.
You shut up.
The deal is this.
He'll take you to the gato.
You just show me
how I get out of this jungle
so I can take him home. Deal?
Do we... have a deal?
Deal.
Let me get this straight.
She gets what she needs,
you get what you need
and I get the shaft.
- I could always give her back the gun.
- I really don't like you.
- Well, I get that a lot.
- Seriously.
What?
I was just wondering
how it is you came to do,
you know,
whatever it is you do.
- It's a long story.
- It's a long walk.
I grew up
in a very rough place.
One thing led to another,
that's all. Just like you.
Like me?
Yeah. You get pushed,
you push back.
But with me, I pushed so hard
that word got around.
Before I knew it, I was standing
in a room full of the wrong people
with the wrong money.
So you think I'm standing in a room
full of the wrong people?
Yeah.
- Something like that.
- I like you, Mr. Beck.
Really.
But you and I are nothing alike.
Travis, let's keep moving.
Let's go.
[Water Rushing]
What are you doing?
Let's take us a little swim,
Wolfgang.
We're not swimming.
We're moving.
- Let's go.
- Come on, big boy.
You could use a bath.
Travis, we have to keep moving.
It'll be dark soon.
Why? We're already here.
Don't pee in the water.
Why?
A candiru, a vicious parasite will
swim up the urine into your pau.
Whoo.!
Come on, big boy.
Feels good!
Swim up my what?
Your pinto.
It'll swim up your ding-dong.
And once it gets in,
you can't get it out.
Whoo-hoo-hoo.!
Come on!
[Stammers]
Well, then what?
They have to amputate.
Not this boy's pinto.
Uh-uh, not today.
The hieroglyphic code said
the great chief of the Marajo people...
put the gato to sleep
behind the walls of a moving curtain.
A waterfall.
Whoa.
Must be some kind
of methane buildup.
It's cool. Let's go.
[Screams]
[All Gasping]
Yeah, real genius.
You have no clue what you're doing.
Aw, shut up.
You obviously don't know the first thing
about methane deposits.
Oh, and you do?
Shut up.
What'd you just say?
[Walls Creaking]
What is it?
Why do I get the feeling
we are not supposed to be here?
Because we're not.
Whoa! Jesus!
There it is.!
I told you it was real.!
Travis, you're never gonna get back there.
It's too dangerous.
- [Gasps]
- [Beck] The roof is coming down.
Wait a second.
Jaguar.
I know what this is.
Monkey.
Eagle.
I can't hold this, Travis.
- I know what this is.
- What is it?
It's an -year-old safe.
This is how they kept
their treasures protected.
There's a combination.
Jaguar. Cat.
Gato. Cat.
It's gotta be thejaguar.
If we hold the sticks closest
to the jaguar, we'll be okay.
In about seconds,
then the whole roof's coming down.
You're not gonna touch anything.
Let's go.
Follow thejag.
Follow thejaguar.
[Grunting]
Easy. Easy.
- [Gasps]
- It's comin' down, Travis.
[Beck]
What are you doing?
Let's go.
[Mariana]
Pass it to me.
- Is that a jaguar?
- I think it's an eagle.
Travis, hurry!
Oh, look at that.
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.
I did it.
I found you.
Not some Oxford archaeologist
or some stiff-assed Harvard professor.
- I did! I found you!
- Who gives a shit?
How do you like me now,
huh, Beck?
Go.! Go.! Move.!
Now.! Run.!
Let's go!
[Screaming]
[Mariana]
These are konlobos.
They're very rare.
You're lucky.
And I wouldn't flirt
with El Gato do Diabo's eyes
if I were you.
- They say it's quite dangerous.
- What else do they say?
That once restored to its rightful owners,
the rivers will run deep, laden with fish.
And the trees will grow tall
bringing shade for thousands
ofhammocks...
so its people may rest
their weary backs.
You think bringing this gato
to your people will do all that?
No, Mr. Beck, but I expect
the money selling it brings
will do just that.
We can buy seed, irrigate,
farm our own lands,
free ourselves from Hatcher's mine.
Lutadores da liberdade.
When that statue hits the black market,
it's gonna vanish forever.
It's a little late for morals,
don't you think?
Especially after you were going
to do the same thing yourself.
And % of that black market
is going to pay for your freedom,
so I'd be a little more grateful
if I were you.
What if I told you I was gonna
give it to a museum so that
the whole world could appreciate it?
You can tell me anything
you want, Travis.
But I know you.
[Scoffs]
So, what are you gonna do
after you bring him home, Mr. Beck?
- I'm gonna open a restaurant.
- Yeah. He's a killer in the kitchen too.
Ten, tables. Nothing fancy.
Italian.
Southern Italian.
How do you, uh...
How do you, uh...
How do you spell, uh...
konlobos?
[Sighs]
Konlobos,
with a "K."
Don't worry. After four or five hours,
you'll be as good as new.
The fire will keep the animals
away until sunup.
I'm sorry,
but money has a way
of changing people.
You did find it, Travis,
just like you said.
No one can take that away from you.
[Kisses Cheek]
And I will send you the money
to buy your freedom. I meant that.
You kept your word,
and I admire that.
So I'll keep mine.
Go north until you reach
the Quantana Road. Take it south
all the way to the airfield.
Good luck to you, Mr. Beck.
[Kisses Cheek]
[Footsteps Departing]
[Footsteps Approaching]
[Slurred Speech]
Oh, shit.
What?
[Slurred Speech]
What?
What?
Monkey. Monkey.
Monkey, where?
Just get him away from me.
- Get out of here, monkey.
- Get out ofhere, monkey.
[Animal Roaring]
- Oh, no.
- I hate this place.
- Get out of here, monkey!
- I hate penis-eating minnows...
and I hate freaky fruit!
- [Grunting]
- Get him away from me.
I wanna go home.
I want concrete.
- Get out of here, monkey!
- I want homemade tortellini.
- [Hissing]
- I want my Los Angeles Lakers!
- [Travis] No.!
- I wanna go home. I wanna go home.
- Get out of here, monkey!
- I wanna go home.!
- [Screeching]
- Get out of here, monkey!
Get out of here, monkey!
[Grunts]
[Boy Shouting In Portuguese]
Oh, what about that?
Been for a stroll, have ya, boys?
Where's my bag?
Where's myJeep?
Give me my bag.
You have any water?
Sit down. How soon
before we can take off?
There's the slight matter of a Jeep
you left at the bottom of a mountainside.
- I'll take care of it.
- In a right bloody large puddle,
am I wrong?
I said I'll take care of it.
ThatJeep is dead, my friend.
Look, you'll get your money.
Just start the plane.
What's your big hurry?
I'm just trying
to get out of here...
before I run into Hatcher
or any more problems.
Don't go worrying about Hatcher.
That monstrosity won't give
a flying fornication
for the pair of youse no more.
- He got what he was after.
- What do you mean
he's got what he was after?
He caught up with
poor Mariana in the jungle
and relieved her of her artifact.
- What'd you say?
- I said he relieved her of her artifact.
It's a word in the English language,
"artifact."
Artifact, look it up.
Son of a bitch.
He's got my gato.!
Your what?
The gato.
Don't you speak English?
Hey.
Where is she?
Hatcher's got her in town.
He's torturing her for information.
He's doing what?
Lutadores da liberdade.
Freedom fighters?
Freedom fighters, my ass.
Lutadores da loco,
you ask me.
They're all gonna die.
Come on. All aboard.
[Sighs]
Come on.
What are you doing?
We made a deal.
A deal?
What the hell does that mean?
I'm here at the airstrip,
she doesn't have the gato.
You're gonna go in there
by yourself?
No way. No way.
Hey, Hatcher's got a small army
back there.
You don't even know your way
around the town. Oh, wait.
I got an idea.
How about you saddle up
to one of those bulls over there,
you ride into town like
a conquistador and challenge
all them to a duel.
Oh, yeah. I forgot.
You don't use guns.
What's your point?
You're gonna die, Beck.
- The boy's right, Mr. Beck.
Do ya mind if we settle the bill now?
- You need help.
Are you gonna help me, Travis?
All you care about is the money.
No, Beck, you're wrong.
I'd rather die than let
that son of a bitch get my gato.
You need all the help you can get.
Hell, you can even use him,
for Christ sake.
Don't bring me into it.
I got a dodgy knee here.
You can't do this on your own.
Okay, Travis.
I know you're gonna run on me.
It might not be tonight,
it might not be tomorrow,
but I will find you
and I will take you back.
Are we clear?
Yeah.
We'll both probably be dead
in about an hour.
So let's cancel Christmas.
Brava.
Bellissima. Brava.
Your plan of attack was a bit naive.
Man, if I was only
minutes younger, huh?
I suppose now we have a conversation
where you enlighten me.
Mr. Hatcher?
How many more of you are out there?
Enlighten me.
Where are the rest of your compadres?
Enlighten me!
- Mr. Hatcher?
- What I don't get is
why you people are so hostile?
I've been good to you.
I built you a town. Why are we fighting?
Mr. Hatcher.
What?
We've lost contact with Outpost .
There's nobody answering.
Mr. Hatcher, are you out there?
What can I do for you, Mr. Beck?
I have no desire to fight
with you or your men.
For that reason,
you have two options.
Option 'A' You leave the gato
and the girl and you walk
out of town, no questions asked.
And what's option "B"?
Option "B": I make you.
Wrong choice.
Lock down the town.
[People Shouting]
[Man, Indistinct
Over Walkie-Talkie]
[Bell Tolling]
[Blows Note]
[Single Note]
[Man]
Still no visual contact. Team
is checking the perimeter right now.
[Bagpipes]
[Continues]
He... that heard the sound...
of thy holy trumpet
and took not warnin'.
He hath clearly wandered too far...
from the word of God.
And Cornelius Bernard Hatcher,
your hour has come.!
Let's get it on, big boy!
It's time to get back on the path.
[Resumes]
[Distant Rumbling]
[Men Shout]
[Screaming]
That's a lot of cows.
Hi.
[Shouts In Portuguese]
[Gunfire]
What nerve.
Ah, 'bout bloody time, huh?
Somebody, just shoot him.
[Grunting]
[Grunting]
Oh, yeah?
Oh, you want one?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
A little thunder.
You like thunderstorms, big boy?
How 'bout some lightning?
Ooh-ooh!
[Cooing]
Whoo!
[Chittering]
Your... Your ears!
Oh!
[Grunts]
Take the gato and the girl
and get to the airfield.
If you run into trouble,
use her as a hostage.
And, Harvey,
when you're safely out of town,
put her out of my misery.
[Gunfire]
[Gasps]
Boom, boom.
I need help!
Do not go gentle into that
good night, my lovely.
Beck! Help, Beck!
Rage, rage...
against the dyin'of the light.
For there shall be no mercy...
for any force that stands...
blocking this path ofhis righteousness.!
[Muffled]
Beck, help!
Beck!
[Rock]
Move!
Boom-shaka-laka, ta-da!
[Screaming]
No way.
Give me back my gato,
you little bald freak.!
[Whips Snapping]
Oh, great.
[Groans]
[Gunshot]
Whoa!
See ya.
You got the moves.
I'll give you that.
You reached...
into the wrong refrigerator,
Mr. Beck.
[Gunshot]
[Groans]
Hold your horses!
What have I done?
Are we not men?
Hatcher?
[Shouts]
What?
Option "A" is still on the table.
You can walk away right now.
[Chuckling]
Option "A" doesn't work for me.
Before I came here,
what... what did you people have?
Face it.! Be fair.
I put a roof over your head,
a little coin in your pockets.
You barefoot Indians
didn't have pockets...
before Hatcher came along.
I gave you life!
I'm the heart in the darkness. Face it.
You can't run this thing without me.
I am pumping the blood
of the modern world...
into your backward veins,
you stinkin',
ingrate,
Oompa Loompa...
morons!
Okay. That's it. I'm done.
Mr. Beck.
I'll take option "A."
Clear, please.
[Groans]
Oh, shit.
You make a hell of an entrance,
Mr. Beck.
Yeah.
I'd offer you a beer,
but I think you blew up my bar.
Yeah, I think you're right.
Thank you.
We had a deal.
Yes, we did.
And I'm afraid I didn't
deliver on that deal.
How is that?
The gato.
I promised you the gato.
Yes, well, I promised you Travis.
You all talking
about this Travis?
And this gato?
- I'm impressed.
- Yeah, well, make sure
they spell my name right.
I told you it wasn't
about the money.
Well, big boy,
I guess it's your move.
I'm impressed myself, Travis.
[Shaking Hands]
Declan, start the plane.
"Declan, start the plane"?
What does that mean,
"Declan start the plane"?
I'm taking you home, Travis.
Oh, I figured that.
No breaks. Good luck.
You too.
I will send you your cut.
Move.
Uh-huh.
Not a penny less than . million.
Move, Travis.
You really ought to stay away from guns.
You ought to get yourself
a psychiatrist, seriously.
[All Cheering]
Move.
[Chuckling]
Well, look at him.
Look at you with your beard.
You're like a real man.
But you're so thin.
Running is good exercise.
[Laughing]
It's good exercise.
- That's funny. Did you hear him?
Running for your life?
- Yeah.
[Laughing]
I love it, I really do.!
You know, there is not enough aspirin
in the world for a headache like you.
Well, there probably is,
but I understand what you mean.
Well, that's good, 'cause
that means you'll understand...
why you're gonna take that little
trip back to Chicago, huh?
Actually, I don't completely
understand that one.
Ah, still the smart-ass.
I'm not that smart, Dad.
I didn't know she was married.
Well, she was...
very married.
And you, what took you so long?
Your kid was
a tough rundown, Billy.
[Chuckles] Him?
No.
Yeah, yeah.
But I did walk him right through
that door, right, just like we agreed?
You did.
We good?
We're good.
large.
You got your restaurant, kid.
Now get out of here.
Billy, before I leave,
when I was down in Brazil,
they showed me this ritual...
that they practice when they have
these big celebrations.
And what they do
is they eat this fruit...
and it's called konlobos,
with a "K."
So, I figured before I leave,
we can celebrate one last time.
Guys, try some of this.
We'll get it over with. lfhe says
it's good, it's gotta be good.
He's the best chef I know.
[Beck]
Billy, here. You try the first piece.
It's not bad.
Big seeds, though.
I don't like seeds.
Hey, what are you...
[Moans]
[Moaning Continues]
I walked him right through
that door, Billy.
Mm-hmm.
Boy,
you got a funny-lookin' face.
Hey, Dad. Whoo!
I love you, you know that?
Because you showed me something
back there. You did.
I thought you had character,
but I wasn't sure.
You got it, man! You really got it!
Get in the truck.
You pretty much violated
every agricultural law back there.
That's the least of our problems.
I know. You should go back in there
and finish him off.
You wanna go back in there?
Go ahead. Knock yourself out.
I'll wait for you right here.
I'm not going back in there.
Right.
So, shut up, get in the truck
before I change my mind.
Don't push me.
What?
Don't push me.
I appreciate everything
you did back there.
But if you wanna get technical about it,
all you really did is even up the score
since I saved your life first.
Get in the truck.
You don't have to thank me.
But this pushing shit ain't
happening no more. You read me?
Uh-uh.
- Okay. I'm gonna bust you up.
- Go for it.
[Scoffs]
Yeah.
Hey, remember your friend...
Mr. Thunder?
How 'bout his buddy...
Mr. Lightning?
Ooh, I know you know him.
You know him real well,
don't ya?
[Grunting]
I'm just playing, man.
I'll be in the truck.
I'm gonna kill you.
[Hip-hop]
[Man]
What you running from
Who you running to
Ready to kick some ass
Bring a gun or two
Get your whole town
It's gonna be the showdown
And we gonna make the streets smoky
like it was Motown
Come on, come on, come on
I got the temptation
Feeling the sensation
We got our motor running
and I ain't even got my gun
Don't take the third 'cause
I'm prepared to get thejob done
Even if the Mob come
running up in Mach
I don't hold no beef with you
'cause I'm a peaceful dude
Don't make me rearrange your face
like a Rubik's Cube
Don't make me run up in your face
like I was ready to do
Don't bring your ladies into town
Ain't no place safe for you
Run, run, run, run, run, run
Don't slow me down now
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
Run, run, run, run, run, run
Don't slow me down now
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
All right, all right, all right
On your marks, set, ready, go
Hands up, here we go
Some people love me
but a lot of niggers hate me more
[Continues Indistinct]
Now some days
I don't know who to trust
If you were betting men
the good guys usually us
I mean me
I ain't trying to be mean, T.
I'd rather chill, meditate
and sip this green tea
I'm hard as a rock
but I don't need a lot of space
You making a scene
Come on, this is not the place
Don't try to escape, run
or skip town, dude
You making it harder
for everyone around you
I pound you
Run, run, run, run, run, run
Don't slow me down now
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
Run, run, run, run, run, run
Don't slow me down now
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
Don't slow me down now
This is the rundown
Don't slow me down now
This is the rundown
Run, run, run, run, run, run
Don't slow me down now
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
Run, run, run, run, run, run
This is the rundown
Go, go, go, go, go, go
Go, go, go, go, go, go